Long live El Cartoonista

After two blogtastic years, I have decided to move to another blog service. It's not all put together yet, but you can check out the new Cartoonista at www.cartoonista.wordpress.com. Wordpress just works so much better for posting cartoons than Blogger does, and I think you'll like the difference.
Now git!

Gift, bribe, same dif

Previously published in the Davis County Clipper on Jan 17

Do Utah lawmakers really expect us to believe that they aren't influenced by gifts from lobbyists? Yes, apparently.

_________________

No teacher left behind

Previously published in the Davis County Clipper on Jan 10

I love it when the school districts tell us that our kids are their most important priority, when they're doing everything they can to protect their own failing schools rather than let our kids get a better education somewhere else. No wonder they came out with such gnashing of teeth against vouchers.

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Cooties: "Infestation" part 91 & 92

Poppin' out and jumpin' around.

Go, Speed Racer, Go!

Whoa.

I...I just don't know about this. This is one of those trailers that make me wonder whether this will be the coolest movie ever or a huge fiasco.

But Jack from Lost as Racer X? Yeah!

Making life better for government

Previously published in the Davis County Clipper on Jan 3

I think the very fact that you think you need to go out and convince people that you're spending their money wisely should tell us all something...

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Cooties - "Infestation" parts 89 & 90

What's in your bathroom?

Backseat Rage

From the 2008 Perkins Family Calendar

One of the things I like about my current job is that they give their employees free year-long bus passes. I save on gas, and I can sit and read a book or listen to talk radio or podcasts in peace while the driver has to deal with the traffic and snow. It almost makes putting up with the smelly, creepy hobos worth it.

Cooties - "Infestation" part 88

Cooties presents...the 3 Stooges?

Does it come with a shovel?

From the 2007 Perkins Family Calendar

Merry Christmas, y'all!
___________________

And to all a good fright

Previously published in the Davis County Clipper on Dec 20

Our beloved Health Department is conducting free screenings of your kids' presents. I'm grateful for their concern, even though I'm confident my kids' gifts won't make them sick or dead.

The DCHD has already asked me for a high-res copy of this for their wall. This is the third one of mine they've asked for; I expect to be invited to their Christmas party soon.

Cooties- "Infestation" part 87

You kids today and your flashy video gaming machines...

New Transformer Toon Preview

I continue to maintain that the '80s were the best time in the history of mankind to be a kid. Lo and behold, another Transformers in carnation. Only Optimus Prime with a face? And a non-John Wayne voice? You kids today...

Pay up, youse mugs...

From the Clipper:

"Even before it’s up and running, Utah Transit Authority officials are saying they may have to cut hours of service to the FrontRunner commuter train if commissioners in Davis and Weber counties don’t pony up a .05-cent sales tax increase...

That increase is a portion of the sales tax revenue lost when the Utah Legislature removed the tax from nonprepared food. Salt Lake, Utah, Tooele, and Box Elder counties passed the measure, but Davis County commissioners complained in October that they had heard little about the measure until it was too late to act in time for a Nov. 1 deadline."

This one didn't get printed. I'm sure I'll find out why in a month or so. I just found the tone of the article to be almost comparing UTA to the mafia and went with it...

Jack Bauer for President

Can't blog. Watching 24.

______________________

Cooties - "Infestation" part 85

Haven't we gone over this?

For God so loved the Cougars...

Previously published in the Davis County Clipper on Nov 29

Okay, so I was happy to see BYU win the Mountain West Conference. I'm not big on the BYU/Utah rivalry myself, being a Utah State Aggie (2-10, baby!). However, BYU holds a soft spot in my heart; my grandparents used to take me to games when I was a kid. I got to watch Ty Detmer make history, while chowing down on snacks on my hard metal seat. Good times.

Anyway, I would be more of a Y fan if it wasn't for the pompous self-righteousness of most of their fans. So Austin Collie's well-intentioned but stupidly-worded comments didn't help. I'll be surprised if he's allowed to speak to the press next year...

Cooties - "Infestation" part 84

A little holiday season format change...

Cooties - "Infestation" part 83

Lost and Found

Thanksgiving 2007

From the Perkins Family Calendar 2006

"Before Thanksgiving brings out the worst in you, stop before you gripe. Give thanks for noisy houses, healthy children and overflowing company. Give thanks for bounteous tables, rambunctious friends and neighbors, life and limb. And give thanks for those who give of themselves -- in service to our nation, in civic duty and in answer to His call -- all year 'round."

-Michelle Malkin

Previously published in the Davis County Clipper on Nov 15

As lawmakers consider whether to raise their salaries, I would be willing to ask any of them if they think they should be making more than any Utah school teacher. What would their response be?

Seven posts in seven days -- yeah!

Last night we went to a church activity at my mom's ward, where the Young Men and Young Women put on a magic show with such feats as levitation, sawing a girl in half, and "The Prestige" (here's an example). I don't think my oldest appreciated it; he knew it obviously wasn't magic but seemed to be offended that it was advertised as such. I had to explain to him that it wasn't to be taken seriously and to appreciate the kids' efforts in executing the illusions. His mind just works a little too logically, I think.

Opinionation catch-up

I've got the political bug back, and have started updating my other blog "Under Your Nose" again. It's designed mainly for anyone who would like to be informed about what's going on in the world but doesn't have the time or patience to seek it out; just something to read every day that'll take ten minutes of your time but leave you more informed than before.

Calvinated

A few days ago my wife came up with the idea of painting some murals on the bedroom walls of my son who turns 8 soon. The theme was easy: when midnight comes around and we can hear giggling coming from my son's closet, he's usually tucked away in there with one of my Calvin & Hobbes books. Here are some photos we took of the process:









Nathan's favorite sport: Calvinball!


The incline in the ceililng led itself to one of C&H's famous sled runs...


My son with Calvin as Stupendous Man!


The Get Rid Of Slimy girlS headquarters (sign forthcoming)

Elections catch-up

From the Perkins Family Calendar 2007

I admit that I forgot to register to vote until after the "15 days before an election" deadline, after moving to Centerville in March. I hang my head in shame...

THE issue this election that brought tons more people to the polls than normally would have come was the school voucher referendum. I myself was in favor of them, but I'm more in favor of Utahns being able to put it to a vote than having the Legislature pull a fast one on people. I think I did more cartoons for the Clipper on this issue than any other one.


Previously published in the Davis County Clipper on Nov 1


Previously published in the Davis County Clipper on Nov 8

Cooties catch-up

I've updated parts 78-82 of "Infestation" since I've last last posted about Cooties. Check out my spiel on the latest update for my thoughts on making it an all-around better comic...

Halloween catch-up

From the Perkins Family Calendar 2007

Halloween came and went without the drama of last year. The littlest was sick, though, so my wife took the boys out trick-or-treating with her friend and said friend's kids. The boys were studly-looking as Mario and Luigi, and we made sure to limit them to a few pieces of candy before bed...


Previously published in the Davis County Clipper on Oct 25

Of course, a Halloween-themed editoon is expected when you pick up the paper before All Hallows Eve, and I had some fun with this one. Old people are funner to draw than anything else, in my opinion.

And, since I had neither the time nor means to make me a Doctor Octopus getup this year, I donned my pizza uniform and a spiffy box-car. My wife's holiday festivity is starting to rub off on me in some ways. Or maybe it's just being a dad, but I just can't go without a costume of some sort for Halloween anymore.

Catch-up week?

Can I do it? Can I do a blog post per day this week? Sir (or madam), I accept your challenge!

Previously published in the Davis County Clipper on Oct 18

First off, let's catch up with a Clipper toon from last month. I know I could cheat and do nothing but Clipper toons this week, but I won't.

Anyway, I thought I'd start with this one. Ever since childhood, I've never been able to read in the car without getting extremely nauseous (nauseated?). Since I've started taking the bus to and from work, and it already makes me queasy with its locker-room/detox unit odor, I figured I'd pull out a book and see if it would make things worse. Happily, I have been able to survive the experience much better than when I was a wee lad, so I'm able to have about an hour a day to enjoy a good book!

I've really had the reading bug for the past few weeks, devouring Mark L. Van Name's One Jump Ahead, Orson Scott Card's Speaker for the Dead trilogy, and Vince Flynn's Transfer of Power and The Third Option. I've got Laura Ingraham's Power to the People reserved at the library, and An Inconvenient Book by Glenn Beck is on my Christmas List!

Don't worry, I'm not just being lazy by reading books. I've also been spending an inordinately massive amount of time (for me, anyway) watching TV and movies. The Hollywood Writers' strike is probably going to be a good thing for me...

Anyway, November is when all the good summer movies come out that I was too poor to see in the theaters. I'm finding TV shows to be better than anything that's been in the theaters lately, though (with the exception of Meet the Robinsons and Ratatouille, which were great to watch with the family).

Angie and I usually watch TV exclusively online, since we don't want to spend money on TiVo but still like watching stuff at night after the kids are in bed. We're catching up with the third season of Lost, and are enjoying the second season of Heroes (heaven for a comic book geek like me), and are anxiously awaiting the sixth season of 24 on DVD.

Another recent discovery we both are enjoying is Pushing Daisies. I don't know how popular this show is, but you all need to watch it so it stays on the air (writers' strike notwithstanding). This review describes/endorses it better than I can.

Let us sing a song

From the Perkins Family Calendar 2007

They do lie in wait to deceive...

Previously published in the Davis County Clipper on Oct 11

The article to which I make reference in this cartoon made me do a double-take. It was supposed to be a nice little report on how wonderful Main Street will be in Centerville in a few years. But a little phrase was just slipped in there like it was nothing:

"and planners said that the city would be wise to use eminent domain.

'You may be taking a few feet from people, but you’ll be making it safer for the entire neighborhood,' said Petheram."

Um, what? The government taking our property will make us safer from what, exactly? Not the government, that's for sure...

Cooties - "Infestation" part 77

Dangerous games...

Back from the lazy

So yeah, I fell off the face of the earth for the last month, I guess. Lotta stuff goin' on. Well, not really, I don't have any excuse. For today, I'll post the last few Clipper toons I did. Boring local stuff:

Previously published in the Davis County Clipper on Sep 20th



Previously published in the Davis County Clipper on Sep 27th



Previously published in the Davis County Clipper on Oct 4th

And, since I've last posted, I've updated parts 71-76 of Cooties (including my super-sized 75th strip!)

Idle voters

A few Davis county cities had their primary elections for city officials; Centerville didn't have one, which is just as well, since I forgot to register to vote since I moved here in March. Better get on that...

Sort of taking a break?

The 6th anniversary of 9/11 has come and gone. Please read my amigo Señor Dangriga's post; it's a good reminder, and because I really have nothing more to say on the subject. I am so totally and completely burned out on politics and world events right now, so I've decided to spend now through January going to the sports page instead of the front page of the paper every morning. I'll be keeping track of the NCAA football Top 25 and the NFL standings instead of the presidential election polls until the Bowl games have all played out.

It'll be especially hard to crank out Clipper toons for the next little while, but I need to get away from Hillary, Osama, and Rocky Anderson before I go postal or something (kidding, National Security Agency!). Maybe by February I can pull my head out of the sand and see what's what.

There will still be cartoons posted here on a regular basis, though. I am in the zone as far as getting Cooties posted on a regular schedule is concerned, and may have time for other things here and there. It's time I get started on the Perkins Family 2008 calendar, too...

See ya!

Those backpacks get heavier every year...

Previously published in the Davis County Clipper on Aug 30

Cooties - "Infestation" part 69

The name game...

Cooties - "Infestation" part 68

Back to school...

Cooties - "Infestation" part 67

Practical jokerin'!

Just when you thought it was safe to go back in the water...

Previously published in the Davis County Clipper on Aug 23

Our condo has a pool. I still haven't gone in, but the rest of my family are really enjoying it. Now I can use the parasites as an excuse to stay out of the water...

The Davis Health Department asked me for a high-res copy of this one, too. They're starting a collection of my work, presumably to make fun of.

Cooties - "Infestation" part 66

Luck be a bug-eyed, tentacled alien toniiiight!

James E. Faust -- 1920-2007

The company I work for doesn't technically work for the LDS church, but it feels like it most of the time. They were nice enough to let us off work for a little bit on Tuesday to attend the funeral of President James E. Faust, 2nd counselor in the First Presidency of the Church. His death was quite a surprise, and those who spoke honored his memory in a very spiritually uplifting way. He will be missed.

On another church-related note, I will be singing in the choir in the Priesthood session of General Conference in October. I'm excited, it should be a great experience.

The peasants are revolting!

Previously published in the Davis County Clipper on Aug 16

My oh my, how people are mad about the skyrocketing property tax rate in Davis County. The picture that accompanied this article had a bunch of screaming elderly folk about to form a mob; it was great.

Cooties - "Infestation" part 65

Gettin' uppity on today's Cooties...

To the Perkins-mobile!

From the Perkins Family Calendar 2007

Talking with my wife tonight and working on something neat got me wanting to post this cartoon.

I hate road trips. My family took one or two when I was a kid and finally decided that a good vacation entailed housesitting for our rich friends and using their hot tub and big-screen TVs, rather than riding in a hot car for endless hours.

My wife, however, comes from a family where a couple long trips a year were just part of growing up. Canada, Indiana, Wyoming, national parks and distant family members were expected to be seen every once in a while.

Lucky me, my kids have inherited my wife's point of view on the subject to some degree, so I've been subjected to some of these voyages in the past few years, usually grumbling the whole time (okay, Yellowstone was cool, but I won't give my wife the satisfaction of telling her that!).

Anyway, there's really no point to this, I'm just posting a cartoon and reminiscing...
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Cooties - "Infestation" part 64

Mind-controlled moms are still moms...

The climb is getting harder

Previously published in the Davis County Clipper on Aug 9

It seems like you have to make a deal with Satan to buy a house anymore...

Cooties - "Infestation" part 63

Hall monitoring!

I have questions, queries, pollzers...

Something's been spinning around in the back of my mind for the past few days and chipping away at my sanity: This article from the Clipper, which details the horrible experience of one Mr. Seegmiller.

You see, Mr. S enjoys his Sundays. He likes to go to church and spend time with his family on Sundays, as do all good upstanding God-fearing folk. On this particular Sunday, however, the sanctity of the Sabbath was violated when Mr. S heard band music emanating from the Junior High School behind his Bountiful home. He went to investigate and was shocked, shocked to find band members practicing instruments in bikinis and speedos! Yes, here in our very own community of Zion.

The orgy of music and debauchery was brought into the midst of the Saints by the Blue Coats marching band, visiting from Canton, Ohio.

And that's basically it. There are two extremely disturbing things about this article, though. And one of them I just can't put my finger on.

First - The self-righteousness of Mr. S makes my eyeballs want to explode. "This is Sunday, and it’s a day for worship and meditation and spiritual things...I understand we want to open our doors to people, but if they are coming to our community, which is family-oriented and conservative, they should adhere to our standards,” he is quoted as saying.

Don't get me wrong, I agree with his attitude about the sanctity of the day [he hypocritically posted to his blog on Sunday], but more importantly I agree with the 11th article of faith of the LDS Church: "We claim the privilege of worshiping Almighty God according to the dictates of our own conscience, and allow all men the same privilege, let them worship [or choose not to worship] how, where, or what they may." Yes, Mr. S, it is a special day, but by no means can we dictate to others that they "adhere to our standards." This holier-than-thou attitude is the main beef that Utahns who are of other faiths have with the members of the church, and they're right.

Get off your high horse, Mr. S. You could have done any number of things in this situation. You could have put in earplugs and read your scriptures, you could have put on some spiritual music of your own to drown out the "ruckus", or you could have simply and politely asked the band members to tone it down a bit. Which you may well have done, because what follows next is extremely vague as far as the article goes, and leads into my next point about what disturbs me about this story.

Second - I can't for the life of me figure out how this article made it into a newspaper, much less the lead story on the front page of the paper! Is the editor a member of the church and wanted to show the rest of us the ungodly behavior of some NON-Mormons? Is he anti-LDS and wanted to show an example of the self-righteous indignation some Mormons are prone to expressing? I don't believe either of these are the case, which makes this all the more perplexing to me.

Something else fishy is the amount of missing information, and the reliance of only Mr. S as a source for so much of it.

For example:

"According to Seegmiller, the young women in the band and drill team were wearing bikini tops and bottoms and halter tops, while some of the young men wore only Speedo swim suits."

Really? All the women were in bikinis and the guys were in speedos? "According to Mr. S", they were, so it's good enough to not verify for yourself, Mr. Writer?

"Even more, Seegmiller claims he was treated poorly by two men from Utah County who were working as advisers to the band.

'I was basically accosted by these men,' Seegmiller said. 'I was trying to find out what other neighbors thought, and the police came and these men just screamed at me, saying degrading things about the LDS Church.'"

What? What does "find out what other neighbors thought" mean? Were there other people present that he happened to be asking, or was he going door-to-door or calling people like a good busybody should? It leaves that out for some reason. And "the police came" is sort of brushed off, as well. How did the police come to get involved?! Isn't that kind of important? Why is nobody else quoted in this article who was actually present?

Anyway, I know this is such a minor thing, but I can't let go of the reaction I had when I read this on the (again) front page of a paper I work for, and therefore have a stake in its credibility. Are the questions I pose unreasonable? I don't think so.

To every annoying thing there is a season

Previously published in the Davis County Clipper on Aug 2

My fellow pizza man/journalist Dave suggested this one for me. It's an old joke in many places, I'm sure, but always relevant.

Friendly Neighborhood Buble

As if I didn't need another reason to love Michael Buble, I find this. Awwww yeah...